It is estimated that 8 million Americans have an eating disorder – seven million women and one million men. The shear numbers of that statistic alone are horrifying. One in 200 American women suffer from anorexia and two to three in 100 American women suffers from bulimia. An estimated 10 – 15% of people with anorexia or bulimia are males. Aside from all of this at least half of everyone in America will know someone with an eating disorder in their life. That’s at least 152,029,862 people. Anorexia is the 3rd most common chronic illness among adolescents and 95% of those who have eating disorders are between the ages of 12 and 25. 50% of girls between the ages of 11 and 13 see themselves as overweight and 80% of 13-year-olds have attempted to lose weight.
This isn’t a problem that we can ignore or hope goes away. Eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any mental illness and the mortality rate associated with anorexia nervosa is 12 times higher than the death rate of ALL causes of death for females 15 – 24 years old. A recent study conducted by the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders reported that 5 – 10% of anorexics die within 10 years after contracting the disease; 18-20% of anorexics will be dead after 20 years and only 30 – 40% ever fully recover. 20% of people suffering from anorexia will prematurely die from complications related to their eating disorder, including suicide and heart problems.
Only one in every ten Americans has access to treatment for their disorder. Treatment of an eating disorder in the US ranges from $500 per day to $2,000 per day. The average cost for a month of inpatient treatment is $30,000. That’s less than the average American working salary for an entire year. It is estimated that individuals with eating disorders need anywhere from 3 – 6 months of inpatient care yet only 80% of the girls/women who have accessed care for their eating disorders get the intensity of treatment they need to stay in recovery – they are often sent home weeks earlier than the recommended stay. The Health insurance companies for several reasons do not typically cover the cost of treating eating disorders since the cost of outpatient treatment, including therapy and medical monitoring, can extend to $100,000 or more.
Education is our best weapon in fighting this epidemic. Know your healthy body weight index. (http://www.halls.md/ideal-weight/body.htm) Don't base your opinion on what you see in the stores. If today's mannequins were actual human women, based on theoretical body fat percentages, they would probably cease to menstruate. The average woman is 5'4" and weighs 140 pounds. The average model is 5'11" and weighs 117 pounds. Most fashion models are thinner than 98% of American women. If you feel that you have problems with your weight, talk to a doctor. If you need to, they can help you set up a diet that is healthy and beneficial.
I know there has been a lot of talk about Twilight lately. It's addicting to love or hate and that my friends is a sad fact. This shouldn't be a popular topic...
I read the books when they first came out and hated them and I still don't like them to this day. My personal Reasons?
>The grammar was atrocious. No more needs to be said. >The writing style makes me think of what it would be like to read a book that was written by a third grader on crack who just discovered what adverbs are. (Seriously, 99 adverbs in 22 pages?) >Bella is a static boring character meant to allow ANYONE to remove Bella and insert themselves since Bella herself has no real personality, moral depth or general development. This is convenient since it lets the readers play out their own little sick and twisted sexual fantasies. Bella is nothing but a plot development. Ever notice that she never does anything herself. The few things she does do (like going to rescues her mother) only manages to worsen her situation causing everyone around to take action to save her. THAT my friends is a perfect example of a plot device. Bella is not a strong heroine like everyone likes to think. Her boyfriend leaves her, and she tries to kill herself; but she's real strong alright. >MOSTLY though. Edward is abusive. EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE. And the funny thing...no one seems to notice.
Allow me to divulge in my reasoning.
The symptoms of abuse are easy to find online, I am referencing the list found on HelpGuide.org.
Abusers use the following tactics to remain in control of their victims:
Dominance. Abusive individuals (for example, Edward Cullen) need to exert control over their partners. By say, making their decisions for them (“Bella, please just do this my way, just this once.” Or, the “memory tampering” in chapter 17 of Twilight. Or dragging her to the prom in the epilogue), and expecting to obey without question (the whole of chapter 18 when Bella attempts to argue with Edward). Further example of this can be found in the fact that Edward refuses to let Bella drive, and their carefully constructed “rules” on what physical conduct is acceptable and unacceptable, rules which often come to Bella’s detriment.
Humiliation. An abuser will do whatever they can to make you feel bad about yourself, or “defective” in some way (i.e. Edward’s conversations with Bella through much of Twilight revolving around the fact that she is an idiot for being with him, she can’t survive without him, etc.) The idea is that you are the crazy one, and if you believe you’re worthless and can’t find someone else, you won’t ever leave. Bella makes comments in Twilight and early on in New Moonto the effect of “I am too plain and boring for Edward, I don’t deserve him.” This is the product of naturally low self-esteem, and, in realistic characters, the fact that her lover calls her an idiot whenever he can.
Isolation. The abuser needs their victim to be dependent on them, and will often try to do this by cutting you off from the outside world. Edward seems to perpetuate this less on his own, as Bella readily throws herself into it. She has no actual friends in the series beyond Edward and his sister, Alice. Her only social activity is working at the local sports store, if you can call that social. She is willing to isolate herself from her parents as well, if it would mean getting to spend eternity with her abuser. You could argue that Edward is manipulating her into this (I mean, really, there’s nothing bad about being a vampire).
Threats. Abusers will threaten violence on their victims in order to exert further control. In the Twilight series, this is a little more subtle and insidious. Edward warns Bella that he could hurt her, that he could lose control at any moment. In chapter 8 of Twilight, he admits to having murderous thoughts regarding the ruffians Bella was accosted by, to further illustrate how dangerous he is. Even more shocking, he tells Bella later that he wanted to kill her when they first met. Every chance he gets, he “warns” her that he could murder her at a moment’s notice. Worse, his attempts at “saving” her often end in physical harm coming to her anyway, such as the James “conflict” and Bella’s birthday party in New Moon. Bella learns to make excuses and quick stories for the bruises, cuts, and broken bones she sustains, in a rather unsettling mirror of an abuse victim’s behavior. That’s not to mention Edward’s vague suicidal threats, should anything happen to Bella.
Intimidation. Abusers will often try to scare their victims into submission. Edward in chapter 13 of Twilight, jumping around, smashing trees, showing off how fast and strong he is, in an attempt to make Bella frightened of him. Do I really need to say more?
Denial and blame. Abusers are very good at making their own excuses for their actions, and shifting the blame. Again, this is a little more subtle in the Twilight series. Edward blames his behavior on being a vampire, on having to resist human blood, and on having buried his humanity for so long. In a supernatural setting, it’s hard to say that these excuses are not justified, but they are still excuses. Bella, again, readily assumes the blame for anything bad that happens to her as a result of Edward’s actions. Edward will occasionally make the token effort to convince her this isn’t the case, but there are a few times where she shoulders the blame unhindered. Edward has also told Bella that if she gets hurt, he’s going to blame it all on her. He also seems to think that if she kisses him too hard and he eats her, that’s going to be her fault as well.
Abusers will also exhibit signs of remorse after periods of abuse, entering the “honeymoon phase” of the cycle. They will make it up to the abused in whatever way they can, in an attempt to keep the victim with them. They may say “I’m sorry I hurt you,” when what they mean is “I’m sorry I hurt you, because I might get caught.” This creates further conflict in a victim who would otherwise leave the relationship–”when he’s not making me feel like garbage, he’s very sweet.” Edward writes songs for Bella, and offers to buy her expensive gifts. Then he refuses to let her drive and warns of the threat of violence if she open-mouth kisses him.
Bella, as well, exhibits signs of someone who is abused. She accepts the blame readily when terrible things happen, especially when it was through no fault of her own. She suffers mysterious injuries, and will have elaborate tales for how she sustained them (“I fell down the stairs and into a window”). She has incredibly low self-esteem, and considers herself lucky to be with Edward. She is always ready with an excuse when Edward begins to treat her coldly, hurts her, or otherwise emotionally abuses her.
Seriously people. Abuse is a problem, a MAJOR problem. The fact that so many women are now looking for a "Edward Cullen" kinda creeps me out. Is this what our society is coming to? Women, shape up. This is a poorly written fiction series. It's not a work of art, and it's not "good literature".
I could go on and on and on, but since this is a "mini-rant" I shall leave you with this to think about.
Let me tell you about Roxanne. Why am I telling you. Because I know more about her than she knows herself; or would know if Roxanne were real. Roxanne is a fabricated persona, created by me for the sole purpose of a story. Roxanne, is a character.
Roxanne’s overall constitution can be described as, average. Average height, weight, and looks. She isn’t great at sports but she isn’t bad; she isn’t great at the arts, but she isn’t bad. Everything about her is simply, and perfectly, average. Where you expecting something else? I suppose you were expecting a ‘but’ followed by me relinquishing some sort of information that would then cause Roxanne to become more interesting, or even less average. There is no ‘but’, there is only truth, and the truth is: Roxanne, is boring.
Why would I want to write about a boring character? Why would I even create such a character. After all, no one wants to read about a boring character. Well, funny thing about characters is that they always have a flaw. Some defining quality that both endears us to them and repulses us; possibly because we get the distinct feeling that we are looking in a mirror and not at a stranger. Regardless of your attraction to the flaws of the character they are always present and this is because no one wants to read about a perfect person. That would only work to further point out to us all of our own failings and that is something we all try desperately to escape; our own flaws and mishaps. But that’s an entirely different story. Our story is about Roxanne.
Roxanne has a flaw, a pretty good sized one, and you might have already guessed it. Roxanne’s flaw is that she is average. But that isn’t the extent of the damage. There is something bigger here than just her undistinguished character. The true depth of her flaw is that she is okay with being average. She has no issues with being a wallflower and because of this she has no motivation, will or desire to change; even though she could. A crime for sure.
Is it really alright for Roxanne to not have issues with herself as she is. Some would argue that as long as she likes herself she shouldn’t have to change. There would be no need to change. And change without necessity is wasted time. The other side would counter asking how would she know if she is the happiest how she is. Since she’s never reached her full potential. And what would be required for her to realize that she needs to change.
So here comes the part with the story. Since our Roxanne is the focus of our tale I think it best to start with her.
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This is the prologue to a story i have been mulling over all day. Not sure if I will actually continue with it. It’s a love story between a girl who is okay with her boring mundane life, and a friend who comes in and is the total opposite, lives life a little too hard. There is no title yet because I haven’t thought of one. I have barely thought out this sotry past the main plotline. Lol, we’ll see what happens.
1. To cheer someone up. 2. To cheer yourself up. 3. Birthdays! Who needs a cake, these come already in portions! 4. Food fights, think snowballs but better. 5. Parties that do not involve birthdays. 6. Just because! 7. Babysitting. Cupcakes are the ultimate fun food to make besides maybe cookies, and the kids will love them. 8. Late night study dates. Smiles all around when you feel like crying over a Biology test. 9. To say “I’m sorry”. Nothing says i’m sorry quite like cupcakes. 10. To say “I love you”. Nothing says I love you quite like cupcakes!!
I personally like to use the Funfetti mix when making my cupcakes, and star shaped sprinkles. But you can get creative. And the best thing about decorateing cupcakes, is you get multiple tries to get that perfect cupcake! And they are all going to taste great no matter what!
It would appear that this saying only applies to public outings.
Last week I flew into Houston to visit my boyfriend. The night before the flight, I was flitting around my room in somewhat of a giddy daze, I was so excited to be able to fly in to see him. While I was packing I was also talking to people on aim and msn as I always am. One of those people was Ben, my boyfriend. We weren’t saying much, I would ask him from time to time about an item and whether I should bring it or not, and he would answer accordingly. As I was packing in my toothbrush the familiar bell chime from aim tolled and I leaned over my computer to check the message and promptly dropped my toothbrush in the sink. There was a message from Ben that read “My friend Bo wanted to know if we would want to do a threesome when you come in”. My mouth hung open and everything. This was the first time someone had asked me, however indirectly, to have a threesome. My mind started racing, i hardly new the guy, i wasn’t about to have sex with him. Luckily Ben and I are normally on the same page and he had already given his friend an answer. He explained to the friend that we were not in that kind of an open relationship. I breathed a sigh of relief.
I am not one to judge, I believe that everyone has different tastes and I respect that. I am, however, curious as to the appeal of threesomes. I will admit, I am a rather jealous person. It’s not something I am proud of or even like about myself, but it’s ugly little head is there and I can’t deny it. It’s like a pimple on picture day, you can put on all the makeup you want, but it’s still going to be there. Waiting, lurking, for the time when you rub your face a little to much and it can be revealed for everyone to see. Over time and with much negative feedback about my jealous tendencies, I have learned how to let the little things go. Little things like, talking to other girls, calling other girls pretty or hot, even looking at picture of hot models and commenting on them while I am nearby. Because I realize that I do it as well. I can’t help it, when Johnny Depp and Brad Pitt are THAT good looking, I can’t help but stare. A threesome though? The thought of some other girl curling up next to my loved one, stroking him, kissing him and doing other things, that I will leave to the imagination, just turns my stomach to knots. The thoughts alone make me want to punch this hypothetical girl in the face, rip all her hair out and shove it up her nose until she looks and sounds like some primitive animal and then crawl off into a corner with my prize. Yes, I get a little jealous.
I’m not one of those people who thinks that sex is a holy and sacred ceremony that should be preformed with rites and rituals, candles and some kind of animal sacrifice. I do look at as a very sensual act that is shared between people who love each other. I don’t think you have to be married to have sex though since it’s possible to love someone without being strapped to them by golden bonds. So in short, I won’t have sex with someone, unless I think that I love them, or at least feel very very strongly for them. I don’t claim to know what love is. If I were to have sex with two different people, this would mean that I love both of them. In which case, I feel that I would be cheating whoever I was with.
There is nothing wrong with people who participate in threesomes. To experiment with ones sexual life is a good and healthy thing. My ideals and my feelings will not allow me to. Those and the Kraken that lives in the depths of my being that would wreck havoc on whatever poor girl decided to wander into it’s waters.
I Love to dance, I can't dance, but I do anyways. I love my friends and I would do anything for those I love. I enjoy ceramics, building sandcastles, random excursions and new things. I am not sure quite who I am yet but I am learning every step of the way.
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